Birth Stories: Milo’s Surrogate Birth Story | CBC Parents

Family is about love. There is no right
or wrong way to make a family. Like, we’re two gay dads, there’s two moms. There’s all different forms
of making a family. Every family is created
different, but they just all have love
to share with each other, so… Our birth story started like very soon after we met. We were getting very serious, and I told BJ that I
wanted to be a dad. The day I signed my contract with the school board,
I was like that’s what I said to him, “Ok, let’s, let’s do it.” And he was like, “Really?” I’m like, “Yeah, let’s do it.” I just went full time looking for a surrogate and
an egg doner. And I don’t know
why I thought surrogacy would be have more control. I found out later, there’s
no control when you are having a baby you can control nothing. We found an egg doner
right away and then the search for the
surrogate was on that was really the hard
part. We spoke to so many
and there were a lot of great women on there
but then they just changed their mind
at the last minute or they got matched with
another couple. I decided to message this
woman back who had messaged me two
months before and said no. And said, “Hey, did it ever
work out?” and she said, “Actually
it didn’t work out. Do you want to meet?” It just clicked, when we
met her. It was something…
I felt really comfortable I think you probably felt
very comfortable with her. We did. Until she got pregnant I was still stressed I mean, you know,
you have these contracts and other things but anyone can walk away
at any time so it’s still a very scary
process. -Stressfull process.
-There was a lot of crying cause she didn’t get
pregnant the first time. And a month later we
tried again and two weeks later we
found out we were pregnant. Yeah. I think it was all surreal. Yeah. It was surreal until he came. And he was ten days overdue We had our midwife and she kept everything very calm for us and for Kathy and… she comes in, she’s like, “Ok, we’re going to have the
baby now.” And I was just like, oh my god, like we’re having a baby. Like this is it, like… we’re gonna be fathers, like… we’re not… this is it for the rest of our life. As soon as he was out it was just like this warmth
came over you. And, I had said to Frank, I’m like, that’s what, I guess love… true love actually is. It’s just like this burst of…
I’m gonna cry now but… Yeah. I remember my dad,
when I first came out. Instead of his reaction being one of hate and
have anger, he said, “You know, what I’m really upset about is that you’ll never be a dad.” And, um, so… so, I think, for both of us I don’t think that I ever
expected it. It was the happiest day of
my life. So that’s all I can say
about that.

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