Can your penis fall
off naturally? 100% and here’s how. The shaft of your penis,
which is full of blood and guts, is connected to the rest
of your body with skin and guts. If that connection
is loosened or severed, your penis will drop off.
How can that connection loosen? If you spend the next 80
plus years gently tugging on your penis,
pulling it from your body. This will cause the skin
to become more elastic. If, at the same time
you expose the area where your shaft
connects to your body to harsh winds and cold, the skin connecting your shaft
will begin to dry and flake. If you do not moisturize
that area, the flakes
will start to peel off. And if, at that same time
you contract whooping cough and do not have access
to modern medicine, the continual contractions
from your abdomen will shake all the flaking skin
off your shaft and cause your penis
to naturally pop off. Let’s say you never
touch your penis. I hear you. It’s perfectly connected
to the rest of your body. Guess what?
Your penis can still fall off. Here’s how. If you happen
to score tickets to the zoo and are given the privilege
of entering the gorilla cage. Perhaps you have a friended the
zookeeper or have won a contest. I don’t know how you got there. If on that day you wear loose
fitting sweatpants that have gotten thin
from years of wear. And the gorilla is a female
who is in heat and sees the outline
of your penis from your very skin sweats. She could wrap her fingers
and opposable thumb around the shaft of your penis. At which point, a simple tug
from the lady gorilla can pull your penis clean off. You’re not a gorilla person.
Okay? Yes, yes, yes. Okay. Let’s say we take the gorilla
out of the equation. And instead, put you in the cage
with a boa constrictor. It wraps itself around
the shaft of your penis, cuts off the oxygen
and blood from. Now you have to tourniquet
your penis. You have to have a doctor
cut it off. Let’s say you’re never
at the zoo. But instead,
are running through brush and run past an incredibly
strong blade of grass. It will slice your penis
right off. Okay, I hear you.
How about this? Now there’s no field.
You’re in a concrete yard. You join a game of jump rope.
You jump in, just in time for the rope
to wrap around your penis. The little girls
playing freak out. They drop the rope. But at the same time,
two ornery hawks scoop down, grab either end of the rope
and pull. Guess what?
Those hawks yank your penis off. How about there is no yard,
no grass? You’re in a barren wasteland
of sand and dust. You decide to lie down,
face towards the ground. Unbeknownst to you, right under
you is a tiny sinkhole. Small sinkhole. Diameter, I don’t know,
3.66 inches for flaccid penis and 4.59 inches
if sleep makes you hard. Hey, it happens to some people
and that’s fine. Let’s say, you fall asleep
and lay there for 36 hours. That sinkhole will suck
your penis off. And those are just five
scenarios that are very likely. So in conclusion, yes, your penis
can fall off naturally. It’s just a matter
of when and how. I’m expert Natasha, and your worst fear
has been confirmed. You’re welcome.