Candid Motherhood: Pregnancy & Postpartum

everybody what's up welcome back to my channel my name is Ilana and today we are going to do another episode of the miniseries talk candid motherhood so I have two other moms here with me who have two beautiful baby boys and I'll let them introduce themselves hi everyone I'm ki tarah gray and this is my son Caleb gray and he has an older sister Kennedy gray and also brother Kimber green hello everyone my name is Danielle mouse and this is kind of a list of three oh all right so we're going to answer just some questions and just kind of get into some of the things that we went through during our pregnancy nor postpartum or the label process all of it so we're going to get into these questions what did you experience that you weren't so in pregnancy I would say would be nice I always think I have to be knees and our Pete I can't think you have new sound baby showers who has a day because I'm like dang I just touch on that a little bit no I mean people told me that crazy so look yeah I was nauseous like my whole pregnancy so if I was filling up I will end up in it so I didn't know which end I'm totally I was like [Applause] something that did nice pics yes I expected it to be easier because I felt like I was an experienced mom but the truth is that each pregnancy is so different and so I'd say he was one of the hardest because I was older and so I kind of underestimated the youthfulness in my matters am i you yeah I think advantage of dad in my early 20s so approaching 30 I was like oh I can feel this yeah so I see why people say when you're younger ain't you in here in a five-year man him so I win a pretty long time without getting pregnant something it's not like the first time and this time I didn't air with my first pregnancy I tore and I had to be stitched up so I kind of knew didn't with ania and yeah oh you know occasion is well but not with Hartley okay yeah so that was good the only thing I feel like with the unmedicated I said my body news and I could feel when the contraction won't allow me to put in my thought my body was more into it now you need to push now you need to deny so then everybody into some postpartum questions and one of the first things that happens of course new or new mom sometimes is the one set of your milk so I know my experience with my mom first came in I was literally texting and I didn't I don't know if I didn't have a bra in or what but I took I had already in my arms and I was going to take a picture of me and her and I live you looked at and I sure just some kumite I have been waiting on this is not intersection show me in like thick and when I think the last rocks it was so yeah it literally felt like pebbles were in my bracelet so I got in the shower and I was just like I remember that I would say the new coming in was a quite treacherous experience nursing within himself and breastfeeding is difficult but when then milk came in the difference is that I knew that this is the best time to start pumping and storing my frozen man because then explosion I remembered like okay this is what its gonna be the most milk so I was asked to the advantage of it I know it I got my husband to help us Chris should I was about to give a five-year on him help me so he knew from previous experiences like get your hand and I'm voting so you know it was my help he was my you didn't help it out yeah pain I mean like ones the in is just like you get all these big rocks in there like I don't know this is nothing I've heard from in Vail but I feel like the video based on the warmer for real I guess is that I feel I just feel like that just I just want this because they're already heavy and then we a milking yeah you know there's more on your back on your shoulders all this girl so yeah there was a place or time I didn't realize it so I always was gonna do the impression that we're gonna paint not it shot through I thought you'll get like one hole in our nipple we lately have like 10 holes your nipple and it just sprays out like the room not even zoom yeah it's really nice brains out and I was not expecting this knowing I've shot it out oh wait this is no one's dream right what was something you weren't so but you found out through experience this is postpartum you know you the longer you breastfeed you know the more your breasts potentially can say I just hope oh they'll just go back up and not into my sister told you they know and only you do that your body then muscle will become kind of the elasticity what kind of decree so they kind of had me like well do I have to have a good push-up so this I say as it pertains to nursing that's something to be true and I didn't expect um for you to be such an emotional experience I thought I would take the path and exclusively pumping I wasn't interested in really nursing just because I I don't know I just thought that's just too time-consuming but I missed him I miss the intimacy did I say any miss intimacy just like he's missing in there I think I didn't expect the hygiene to become an issue like from nursing like I didn't know I could sweat so much I didn't my armpits with itch and I just didn't know and so I don't actually have a sweating problem like my armpit sweat when I'm nervous and I'm like when I have to speak in public and stuff but I didn't expect it when I was nursing like can we just be drenching and then I would need to find the extra strength the owner in like Jamaa would be like it was vicious heads up to future nursing mothers you choose some good deodorant be prepared to wash under the arms with some extra scrub bit more than once a day because I'm starting to know that you're cycling coming in November it is a thing with us I just pumpkin so she was like a month and so I was supposed to breastfeed my psychic me okay image anywhere and it's just like oh the baby you name it my talk about seven days no one shiny new use on be in the it is freedom but you can get scared doing that's the only thing I mean so it's a plus that you don't yeah and I had spotting in between so I thought oh it's over it's over but then even we're right back to I said God is real I'm not gonna have to have a diaper I was like I need to see yes well you're pregnant you get so used to not having my phone and it's just so yeah just free so we know that you know pregnancy postpartum can really be you know difficult and I know for me I had a mommy breakdown probably more than five hundred times so for y'all we little job I guess first mommy breakdown what was it over and you can't remember dealing with not only him having to take care of him but having two other kids as well and the inheritance for myself and for my husband is will you're just trying to figure everything out with the ring keys yeah so I actually never I would say um I probably had more with my with my daughter but I'd say with him as Danielle just kind of expressed the the challenge of just having three people now to look after I kind of felt a little bit of overwhelmed but then when I kind of started to verbalize when I was feeling as a mostly bust rating and upset I would tell you know I would tell people hey it's just one beat right and I can only okay but the look goes it's just 1 million so I wasn't able to I can't be all things to everyone yeah and so once I realized hey I can only be his mom I can only be Kennedy's mom and I can only be my husband's wife I just began to give him what I could and the moment said I didn't have it I was just articulated oh you beat me getting frustrated because I didn't want to upset everyone else and I know I'm kind of the pillar of the house so once I got upset okay all right yes sir and once I got frustrated I knew if I have a breakdown in every part of this house is not kind of fall apart so I tried to kind of before I felt like myself just getting just pain before I found myself getting to otherwise I tried a sprint cycle counting the bunches I've been a little bit I'm a planner and I'm like I feel like things are you know with a little baby's hair playing your seat so I'm having to do that again and it's been four and a half five years that's what Roger began to kind of collapse by my first breakdown was after her checkup so you don't want to beg you leave the hospital sometimes they drop in their birth weight and so for me one of my biggest troubles is retaining weight gain weight and so when our and left the hospital I didn't know she was driving weight as much you know it was very traumatic for me to go to the you know pediatrician and hearing that you know she drop significantly but my pediatrician didn't say in a way there was alarm issues if I can just keep nursing she'll she'll get her weight back right and so I literally came home and I was trying to nurse sorry and she just went eating this you keep sleeping and so I remember just booze and crying and your mom's in the room sleeping out here crying because I didn't want her to go through that now I'm just like I just want to produce enough to take care of it Jevons silent mode on crepey stuff with my wife I pay priests over her mind and that knowledge doesn't I was just like okay he was like Ilana she's gonna be okay she's gonna be healthy and I'm not living the Lord gave artists juicing this right so I was just crying in I just wanted her to be nosy and you know when I didn't pump for a month because I wanted her to like you know I just wanted this is what I chose to do it's all exclusively nurse and I didn't know how much she was getting and so I feel like I'm not doing right by her because I'm just trying to nurse only and I don't know she's getting the nothing you know it so just a lot of money you know if it was a lot and so now my jucy Lucy all these roles I'm just really critical of myself already and so I say my my breakdown moments probably have come more or less not gonna pressure that other people that given me but the mommy guilt that I have this very yeah but we should know what to do there you should be this you should be there it's a lot of things like until you told me I didn't know that I would still be so hungry I'm still even like I'm eating for three people yeah I didn't expect that so my weight loss hasn't been what I planned because I'm still eating to produce it and I have to realize like I'm producing milk for never do yeah his life is insane because I am sacrificing I'm eating more in grinding more so I think that when I realized the power empowerment of breastfeeding that's kind of like doing this like oh yeah so it is for me my experience I never thought I'd be a person other weird nasty but now I just feel so empowered like when he's begging for my breasts my own the only one they can chemisty yeah that yeah I say there's breakdown moments within there a breakthrough moment yeah I breakthrough moment is when I realize I'm enough wow my god chose me for you and and I'm the reason you're alive so the last question for today is do you currently feel supported I'd say I do I'm I think that I feel support as far as the UH network of women that all have babies around so I feel like when I am having a bit overwhelmed I can call them I think they're having access to Treasury of my friends our lactation that opens in addition my first day to here so when I have issues kind of with my milk I like to reach out to them the Internet is a great support system because it kind of Usher's me like I think Google things that I I didn't know I would ever have to go ahead what does this mean what does that mean and just my husband is the breast for my family and yeah I do feel supported after supportive and most importantly our food supply cables they make me feel capable of doing the work the anointing of a mother like I feel like I got I do feel supported now I know I had my first pregnancy I wasn't really opening up to people and if I feel certain around or if I needed a break or felt like it was just too much I never expressed it to people just keep going and going and going but this time around I'm learning that I have to be more vocal and I have to express more to my her experience for my friend I have witnessed and now that I could say hey look this is what's going on they can share with me hey you know you got this we got this whatever so now yeah I really I can true to say now I feel supported so I would say I definitely feel supported I believe that I have a great support system but I didn't it's like sometimes my mom makes a thought I can't reach out to people sometimes cuz I'm gonna burn it somebody or sometimes I feel like you know this I can deal with it on my own so fun task for me is to even if I feel like something is deadly and all this stuff like I share with my husband like I shouldn't feel like oh that's too silly to share or I'm just overreacting or something like that like I don't know I feel like I sometimes stop myself from being supportive because I tried to overthink things or I try to feel like you know are you action bother them with their butt your support system isn't just there for the big things like they can be there for the small or petty things you're not really thinking about so I definitely do feel supportive because I allow myself to you know go after and get that support but that will be the end of this part I have other moms and other friends that are new mothers older mothers that have a wealth of knowledge and so I hope this video was helpful and informative so let you know that regardless of how you gave birth regardless of its how you feed your child just know that you are awesome others all have to grow in within ourselves but yeah thank you for this is reality okay thank you all so much for tuning in any final words I got being on my channel and living eos traveling in these mommies the outside I just had to find a work my shirt pretty much sums it up I'm a mom and I got this oh no you got it yep alright y'all thanks for tuning in please like comment and subscribe and I will see y'all next time peace out thank you kind of like alright can you see anything

4 Replies to “Candid Motherhood: Pregnancy & Postpartum”

  1. I definitely loved what Ketara said about the empowerment of breastfeeding. It’s so true! #breakthroughmoments! I loved this video.

  2. This was so refreshing to hear other moms speak about breastfeeding, challenges, and changes.♥️♥️ This has always been my heart to speak loudly about the disadvantages vs. advantages about real support systems etc. Great job ladies!👍👍👍♥️

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