EVERY KFC EVER


[Music] [Shayne] Hi, uh… [Shayne] What is your chicken seasoned with? [Kimmy] Oh, it’s the blend of 11 different herbs and spices, but it’s really kind of a secret, [Kimmy] so I can’t really reveal… [Shayne] Is it salt? [Kimmy] Dammit! [Shayne] Every KFC Ever [Ian] America asked and we delivered. Y’all liked how crispy our extra crispy chicken is. So we’re bringing you something new! [Ian] The Crispy Fried Batter Bucket! *licks his mouth* [Ian] You might be thinking to yourself, “But Colonel, there ain’t no chicken in this here bucket!”, [Ian] and while that’s technically true, [Ian] don’t you worry now because we promise we are committed to brutally kill a chicken for every bucket we sell. [Ian] It’s finger-lickin’ good! *licks his fingers* [Ian] MMMMMM! [Courtney] Hi, can I get the famous bowl – extra famous. [Music] [Ian] Why are there so many KFC Taco Bells? [Damien] I know right? It’s like so random. [Courtney] Not really, I mean tacos are the chickens of the burger world, so… [Courtney] And, chickens are like the tacos of the animal kingdom, so… [Ian and Damien] What? [Courney] Actually, it’s just a corporate ploy to save two dying brands and carry less overhead. [Ian] Haha, tight. [Damien] Can I get a fried chicken taco? *Squishes them together* [Courtney] All comes out the same end anyways, am I right boys? [Ian] Yeah! Our feet! [Courtney] *sighs* [Ian] Mmm! Smells like chicken murder. [Courtney] Some places only pick the best chickens to serve… [Courtney] but we believe those chickens deserve to live, which is why we only make our chicken out of the worst chickens in the world. [Ominous Music] [Damien] Hey! Cluck-you! [Courtney] They’re finger-lickin’ good! [Shayne] *Clucks like a chicken* [Ian] Also, why is KFC’s mascot a colonel? [Damien] Oh, yeah, like, what war did he fight in? The burger wars? [Ian] Hahahah… [Courtney] HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! [Courtney] You watch your mouth! He was an American hero! Got a purple heart for bravery in the great Kentucky chicken war of 1645! [Courtney] CHANGED THE METHODS OF KENTUCKY FRIED WARFARE! SINGLE-HANDEDLY KILLED HUNDREDS OF NAZIS WITH A SINGLE BLADE! [Courtney] AND NOTHING BUT A BULLET PROOF VEST FOR HIS LITTLE TOUCHE! [Colonel Shayne] Woah got me in the butt! That’s all right! [Courtney] And saved an entire chicken coop… [Colonel Shayne] Come on boys ! Time to fly this coop! You’re free! [Colonel Shayne] WOOOOOOOO! *Silence* [Ian] But then… [Ian] afterwards he cooked and ate all the chickens, right? [Courtney] Oh, yeah! As quickly as possible. [Damien] Wait, how were there Nazis in 1645? [Courtney] I use their buckets as a laundry basket. [Shayne] Hey, what does KFC even stand for? [Kimmy] Kidney Failure Capital! [Colonel Kimmey] Actually, it’s Kisses From Colonel! [Damien] Wrong! It stands for Killing Fictitious Children! [Ian] You’re all wrong! It stands for Kinky Foot Cuddles… [Courtney] Come on, guys! It’s Keep F*cking the Chicken y’all! [Everybody] Ohhhhhhhhh, yeah…. [Courtney] There you go, there you go. [Shayne] Boy I’m feeling greasy after that. [Commercial] *Sizzlin’ chicken* *Fly buzzing* *Crispy crunch* [Ian] *Sighs* *Everyone having a good time* *Fly buzzing* [Ian] HUHHH, HUHHHHH, HAHHHH, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! [Shayne] I’d like to double down please. [Damien] You know what man, this is actually not that bad. [Ian] Yeah… [Kimmy] *Makes slurping sound* [Ian] Ohhhhhh… [Kimmy] It’s finger-lickin’ good! [Kimmy] You gonna take another bite? [Ian] …Not right now… [Kimmy] Okay… [Shayne] Why, why would you lie? [Kimmy] That’s how I was gonna get the job… they said, “Lie Harry, lie…” [Shayne] I mean, I just knew it was salt, uh eh, it was obviously salt… [Kimmy] My iguana died today and… [Shayne] Your iguana died? [Kimmy] Yeah! [Shayne] Oh, wow, I did- [Kimmy] Rufus! [Ian] The Crispy Fried Batter Bucket! Brian Merino captioned this awesome Smosh video. Check out my Instagram brian_.merino [Courtney] Finger lickin’ good! [Ian] It’s finger lickin’ good mother f*ckers! [Courtney] The’re finger f*cking-licking good. [Shayne] Uh, I think I’m gonna go get Carl’s jr… [Colonel Kimmy] I’ll go with you… [Damien] I’m gonna lock the door… [Shayne] What? [Ian] I’m gonna go lube your feet. [Shayne] How many employees do you guys have? [Damien] Oh, we’re not open. [Courtney] Oh, I don’t work here… [Courtney] GUYS! Smosh Summer Games: Apocalypse is here! Click this box to watch [Courtney] the first competition: Punishment Zombie Shootout! Team Mushroom Clout, babyyyyy! Brian Merino captioned this video of Every [Blank] Ever. Check out my Instagram brian_.merino It’s fun making captions for you guys, so I hope you enjoy! Check out other Smosh videos!

100 Replies to “EVERY KFC EVER”

  1. If u want to know what KFC actually means this is what it means
    ____________________________________
    Kentucky
    Fried
    Chicken

  2. You know that totally relatable moment in KFC when one of the workers creepily pops up from under the table and asks if you're gonna take another bite because you complimented the food… Happens to me ALL the time.

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