Postpartum Depression, Childbirth Classes & POS General

I feel like this Amazon woman have it took like give birth it but but depression with the postpartum not not me I didn't really believe and I just said that that doesn't happen that wouldn't happen to me and but I noticed just something that wasn't feeling happy it didn't tell anybody that I because some is like poor like postpartum like such like in they can occur be like curry woman like postpartum I that's nice number it's not that did I had that husband I couldn't see and can understand and and say look he caught it in time before I got out of control I must say overall she gives us a joy that that nobody else can really give you as mayors I am 32 I am married the Sierra be six years I have a daughter she's two and I'm pregnant currently six months pregnant with my second spining out that we were pregnant it was very exciting I remember when I first told my husband and it was perfect he was having a rough day and I might have a test wrapped up in a little onesie and I tied in a little book and he came home like something for you and I gave it to him and then when he opened it up he started to cry each time he was like I'm gonna be a dad I'm like yeah we found out that we have to take this class in order for him to be in the room and then we did the Lamaze class and Port of Spain general when we got to the class the nurse I was actually she actually gave her time like she it wasn't mandatory like that she was just this nurse working like she worked peers in the hospital and from her experience she said that I mean we would hear stories and papers and news that this maybe died this happened and she felt that she needed to educate new mothers and fathers as to how to conduct themselves she explained what were the proper things to eat exercising she explained that pregnancies are a disease you can do anything just moderation so it was having that I'm going to the clinic and then having the classes it was I felt we were prepared I felt we were prepared I think also when you ask questions and you find out and you educate yourself I think it's better for you it's first time I still was like okay not just feeling and 28 second trimester was like okay this is nice it's cute nice little belly look you look close your skin glow and like it like I had it I really do have a good pregnancy after wash you get big and then you mean the kicking doesn't become cute anymore it become it hurts because then they're like stretching and they're like ready to get out I remember it was Christmas day and I saw to get some paint on my husband's okay wait I think I think she's on her way so let's just you know keep him gonna look out Boxing Day he was actually off on that day so we were relaxing and I started to get this pain but it felt it to me it felt like like I gasps I was like okay maybe I just eat something or whatever and I remember sitting now and there was eating and I was like I kind of like pull back because I felt like something like Oh like the best I could describe but it's like if my insides opened up exactly what the nurse told me to do every time I felt I could actually breathe I did that they all say that when you exercise a lot and you keep them active it actually affects how you can I guess handle the blade which I think I did a pretty good job I wasn't nervous or scared like I mean I took a shower holding my hair I made sure like everything was like that and I'm like I'm I was like what are you doing like I'm getting great husband like whatever and my brother just like panicking and I remember I had everything like organized so my paperwork medical I mean because of going to the clinic and to San Juan clinic they right up through your pores I'm gonna give you everything so you have a copy of everything Panama and finally came I shouldn't take long she came and we head up to support of Spain that's why I delivered my only fear was and I heard horror stories that I said when you bring a water bag doesn't burst on its own like if they had to do it for you the pain is even more and then she came in and she's like she's like mommy I have to burst it like oh my goodness it's okay um the tool she used it's like this long the contraction started to feel a little bit more intense but still I was able to handle and focus okay here I come breathe breathe breathe but like it happened so fast it's like after I got there I was like six centimeters and then like it felt like five minutes I was like eight and the nurse came and she's okay mommy you're ready to go and she like where's all your stuff I say everything's right here paper breaks okay you organized and they move me onto the bed and I said I said wait my husband my husband is like don't worry psyche don't forget I need him there and it's like did he do the closet I guess he did the class and I had I made two copies of that paper I was not playing I had the original and I gave my husband the copy I said do not lose this paper you need to get in and then we came in his scrubs and his he was covered up and so they had all their tools and necessary objects ready and then the minute I first I okay can is you know from the scale of one to ten what's going on I was like what I was like ten it's like I can't hold it anymore and she's okay she's like you're doing this like dad you stay up here you're not to go to see anything down there he remembered everything from his the class because he was able time okay push don't push relax this that less I had to push and then they made the Midwife she stopped like she was like nope she's like stop stop stop she's like you're not pushing I am but she's like she's like no she's like stay gonna get like get in there I'm like okay she came out eyes open and she started to like mmm her heads like she yeah she was like on the move like on the go already and my husband said he broke down he started to cry and that was that just that and like seeing him reacting to his girl it was it was beautiful it was a really really good experience I must say Port of Spain I don't know if it's just a maternity area but the nurse and the doctors were on point maybe how I reacted and how calm I was and how I I answer and I didn't maybe that was what it is because I've heard I've heard people who were treated well and who got the yelled at them whatever and I just said that everybody experiences their friend and everybody's personalities are different we wanted to breastfeed in fact I wasn't putting enough as I thought oh my god I can't feed my child it made me feel really really sad so I was like we gotta find this so I was taking um I was making sure that I was doing things organically as far as eating the necessary things to produce them eventually like I began to produce a lot and so and as I produce she was taking and then I think after a while I started to feel frustrated she she went through a little bit of the big gripe and I went to doctor and I said what can I do and he's like mommy you can't do a thing he was like you have to just let it ride out like it's just something that they have to go through she went through that for about maybe a good three months good three months and it it happened at night that's the kind just hold her really close and there's nice when I cried because she's boiling and she doesn't want any breast milk and she doesn't want she just it's just nothing you can really do for them I just try to hold it really close my husband would take her being in the four walls and every now and then you can't go out or whatever it does take a toll on you it changes your even your marriage you mean like in your relationship it felt as if we were like roommates after a while and we just wasn't like really meshing together and it was just like baby baby baby baby baby baby baby so I think we were losing us until my mom was like you need you guys need a break but I noticed just something that wasn't feeling happy and some days I didn't want to talk or I just I didn't like one of my husband to just touch me and it was a lot and I didn't I just probably thought I was a little depressed because I was like you know home and it's just baby and I felt like you know he's going back to work and you know what I'm just like here and I just felt like this can be it like that's it and I remember him he he sat me down and he said you said babe I said do you think you have postpartum and I was like no I got so upset him to tell me that I was like that me like postpartum that's crazy it's like you're sure I said why would you ask me that and he said because he's like you just not yourself and I remember we were going a friend was getting married and he said well I'm gonna take your shop I'm gonna get some clothes every things that I tried on didn't fit everything everything I didn't know what my size was and I mean I don't want to sound like vain or you know but it messed with me it messed with my mind and I remember put on the last piece of clothing and I just started to cry in the dressing room in the mall and I worked my face came out and he immediately knew what happened he's like what happened I said I don't want to go home and he said was okay and he took me to the store and he just kind of hold he just held me and he said that moment when he saw me break down he said he was very scared because he said he told himself that's not my wife did do a little counseling we wouldn't our pastor he's like I think you guys need to just change the whole dynamic he said go out to this so once I accepted it and I said all right I began to work on myself I didn't tell myself well it's it's okay you just had a baby and then I got back to a smaller size and that's I had to feel good again and our relationship got got better and it got stronger having somebody like it's it's important because you can do it on your own I I realized you cannot do that on your own gotta have somebody there cause it takes a toll you my fear was having a child and having to stop and I would never forget I had a good friend of mine said that having a child doesn't stop your life they helped encourage you to do more but I also tried to instill in our family as well family time an environment where she can be loved and she can learn and and be herself I always a bit like I would go again and yes I'm going again and they always say you know people say well your first time it first is always long it's always this and I just kind of blocked off because everybody's experience different I say the second one is oh it's not the same I'm like whatever I'm an Amazon I did it

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